OMG
i just realized that i did make a blog post today,
but here' s another one,
coz there's something i want to talk about.
So, today, i've been listening to music, and almost died of boredom.
FYI, dying of boredom is now one of the top killers for school children.
ANYWAYS....
so, i had a dream,
"i had a dream"
was going to be the title for this post,
but hey, i forgot, so i have an excuse!!

so, like i said, i had a dream.
it was kinda weird...
Sean-Li was in it!!
(there, i mentioned you in my blog, again)
And, the part that i remember,
was us talking about sleepovers,
well, something about sleeping over at each other's house,
and then i slept over t his house,
and we had a picnic on a golf course...
something like that...
yea...
that was completely random,
and i was gonna write about it in my first blog post for today,
but i forgot!
*sheepish grin*

OH! And, if your my friend on myspace,
look at my profile!
Coz i edited it! :D
well, the layout theme thingo,
and if you have myspace,
don't forget to add me,
and Rara Ally.
just search by the email,
rara.ally@gmail.com

it's a kool myspace page!!
:D

ttyl

I've just realized, that when i listen to a certain song,
it makes me sad.
But i don't think it's meant to be a sad song...
CRAZY MUCH?
Fasting starts on Monday...
GRRREAT
i can't wait.

It doesn't really matter,
but it's just that.....
i have to wake up early!!!
but i can go back to sleep,
but i have to wake up at like,
3 or 4 in the morning!!!

(teehee, 4 in the morning is the name of a song)
and my mum doesn't really want me to go out with friends when i'm fasting,
and i was gonna go to midvalley on Monday!!!
but i might be going there today....
just waiting for a certain someone to come online!!!
*glares at them*

I edited my myspace and tagged profile,
they look cool,
but i like the myspace one better,
because it is better!!!
I'm currently listening to paramore songs,
just coz i want to.
and i have to buy a father's day present!!!
Coz, i told everyone that i was going by fathers day in australia,
and it's on the 7th of September,
so i was hoping to get a present today,
if i end up going to midvalley.

But i still gotta do somethings first.
I think i'm gonna go healthy!!

OMG!!! I LOVE "HERE WE GO AGAIN - PARAMORE"

sorry about that, it just started playing,
now where was i?
oh yes, i'm gonna go healthy!!
kinda, i'm gonna eat salad!!
well, the salad from KFC
*sheepish grin*

yesterday, i was playing revenge is sweeter (than you ever were) - veronica's
i l-l-love that song!!!
well, i do at this point in life!!
you wanna know how random i get?
i'd just randomly say something,
when everyone is quiet,
like,
and then the snail ate the dog,
or something funny like,
and then the dinosaur ate my mum,
wait, i usually say something about eating.
lawwwwwlllll!!!!!!!!

today is merdeka day,
celebrating malaysia's 51 years of independence.
good for malaysia,
and yesterday was when i found out that australia isn't a independant country!
AND that the queen can sack the austrlian government!!
:S
i wish i had that kind of power...
IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!

i can't believe miranda called herself a simpleton.
that's such a cooool word!
i haven't forgotten when she told me that
(on msn)
i think, that i'm buying my dad a book for father's day...
i dunno.
hmpf, hmpf, hmpf
it's that time of year again.
fasting.
:'(
but, like i said, it's not THAT bad, right?

BTW the title has nothing, i repeat NOTHING to do with what i'm/i've been writing.

ttyl

depression is a bad thing,
it's actually a sickness..
kinda.
well, point being,
it's a bad thing.
people end up going to a....
thingo..what's the name??
i think it's psychiatrist..
(i think)

people hurt themselves on purpose,
because they have the feeling that they can control themselves,
well, it makes them feel like they're in control.
this one girl, was normal,
and she thought that she was fat.
and she'd pinch every part of her body that she hated,
so she ended up with bruises all over her.

This other girl,
just started high school, and she was really excited about it.
But then she started to get stressed,
coz she had to much homework,
she stopped sleeping properly,
and she couldn't concentrate.
Her marks slipped, which made her even more stressed.
she started having panic attacks, and hyperventilating
one day, she just couldn't cope with it anymore,
and she had a breakdown on the classroom verandah.
Her mind was full of black thoughts, telling her to end it all.
She was diagnosed with depression, anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder.
now she's 18, and she made a full recovery.

so. i suppose what i'm feeling isn't depression.
i'm just sad, coz my life sucks.
i just want to know if i'm moving or not!!!
if i'm going back to australia,
there was no point in moving here in the first place,
and it was just wasting my parents money!!

but, making new friends is worth it,
but i HATE the exams!!!
that's hate with a capital H
it's like, every 4 weeks we have a exam!!
urgh.
life, isn't a bunch of exams.
what the hell happened to live life to the max??
yea, doing exams is totally living life to the max.
wtf?!

in australia,
we hardly had any exams.
and it wasn't all in one day
*glares at whoever came up with the idea of exam week*
but anyways...
so many things piss me off.
do this, do that!!
i want a LIFE,
i don't want to be a slave,
but i'm actually mother nature's slave,
to bad we can't kill her, to make us happier.
Why is she making us go through the pain??
why do us humans have to be so....
i dunno.
why can't we be like other animals?
why do we have to live in buildings??
i bet there wasn't a problem like this in the 18th & 19 century!!!

i think...that maybe,
i'm all hyper and happy at school,
coz....
i don't want people to see me sad,
but seeing my friends makes me hyper,
they make me feel so happy,
them being them,
us being random...
talking about people..
talking about random things..

why oh why???
lol.
now, coz i feel like writing, i'll tell you about yesterday.

So, first we had literature,
it was....alright-ish i guess..
Tarang stole Arissa's book,
and then, he eventually gave it back,
coz everyone found out.
lol
it was kinda funny, well he was laughing..
no offence or anything.

then we had maths, which was alright-ish.
kinda...err....how maths usually is,
but our teacher isn't here yet,
we're meeting her next week.
i hope she's nice/good!!

then we had french.
and the teacher wasn't at school.
So we had a free period.
and i was watching ally making a slide show,
and then we got in trouble,
well, pretty much the boys got in trouble,
well the ones that were playing computer games
*glares at them*
so then we had to sit in our seats, and put our macs away..
me & ally spent the rest of the time coming up with idea's for the movie!!

Then we had break, which was just like..
break!
lol
and then we had a double period of science.
and lucky me,
i convinced Ms Diana to move me to the 2nd group,
coz i was the only girl.
woot!!!
in science, we were measuring sepals....
don't worry if you don't know what it is,
it's kinda hard for me to explain!!

Then we had lunch, which was just..
normal, but the bad thing is,
the cooler/chiller thing that has the ice cream in it was broken!!
so i haven't had ice cream since....monday or tuesday!!!
so sad
:'(

then we had geography.
it was....alright/funny??
me & ally didn't really graffiti much in my book..
(there wasn't much space left, but now i've found some!)
and, when we said good afternoon,
shein said "good afternoon ms ass"
lol
freakin HI-larious!!
and then he couldn't stop laughing for the rest of the lesson,
geez..and i thought i was bad,
but him!!!
i'm ashamed of myself.
lol

then we had BM, which was just normal,
i mean, you already know about what happened in BM.
i can't believe i survived the first week of school!!
*screams*
but i still have to do my homework....
i wonder where there's a cliff that i can jump off..
wait, i don't need a cliff,
coz i live on the 29th floor,
i can just jump out of the window...
and in my will, i'll say..
SUE THE SCHOOL!!
(that's catchy! :D)

i can't believe it.
i just can't.
if i didn't move,
the courtney wouldn't have sat with my peeps.
so, now i have to come up with good names..
(for her)
and good comebacks..
lol
VERBAL ABUSE!!!
be afraid!
lol
but, i could punch her..
but for some reason..
i MIGHT get in trouble.
good thing i don't go to the school anymore,
or i'll be suspended!
:S

pfft. she sucks...
lol, she doesn't deserve what she has.
i can't believe she's racist!!!
wth?
she's so stupid.
saying that the aborigini's came to australia,
and took the european's kids..
wtf?
that's SOOOO not true.
everyone knows that it was a europeans,
that took the aborigini's kids,
that destroyed families,
that scared the aborigini's!!!
yeap...
courtney is a stupid cow..
but i think i gotta make a "better" name for her,
coz i think stupid cow is toooo good for her!!!

i woner what it's like, to kill someone..
oo
sounds like fun..
i proabably would,
if i wouldn't go to jail.
i'll find someone who deserves to die..
actually..
they don't deserve to die,
i'll find ways to make their lives a living hell,
so that they have to change schools,
or move!!!

i think,
if i do move back to australia,
i'll do the same elective's as katie.
:D
and i'll never forget who i love..
and hopefully i'll forget those i HATE
*fingers crossed*

ttyl

omg...
today was....fun?
ok, well in BM it was funny,
well...
michael wants to
"F*@! Ms Elisa up"
yes, very nice..
BTW, i'm the only girl in the...
beginer's BM class..
but it's F-U-N, FUN!!

ARGH!!!!!!
family problems??
not really "family problems"
just plain, "problems"
pfft. i want to go to aussie,
but i want to stay here..
*screams*
what the hell am i supposed to do??
the better subjects are in aussie,
(no offence)
but, my fav friends are in both countries!!!
and there's easy access to shops here..
urgh!
i dunno.
But as long as i'm still in contact with everyone,
i'm happy! :D
kinda..

To Do List:
FORCE MIRANDA TO GET SKYPE!!!!!
so then we can video call, and the others could come over to her house,
and i could see them ALL again.
*if you guys are reading this, BE AFRAID*

where are you??
(i know i've asked you this heaps of times)
look, about me, probably coming back to aussie,
DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP OR DOWN!!
coz, i don't want to break your hearts..
not that i haven't done it already,
BUT DON'T BLAME ME!!
blame my dad, and the company he works for!!!
I'M INNOCENT
*shifty eyes*
lol...yea, i know what your all thinking,
dara? INNOCENT?!
psshhh AS IF!!!

I'm like, the devils child..
lol
ok, maybe not THAT bad,
but i am pretty bad,
or at least THINK bad.
lol

mama mia,
here we go again,
why, why?
did i ever let you go??

it just suddenly went in my mind.
i wish, I WISH.....
to be happy, and make the people i love, and care about happy!!
i don't want to hurt them..
BTW, me & my mum had another fight today..
pfft, stupid..err..i'll figure out a name for her later,
she just has this special ability to make me angry!!!
it's like, her...err...what the word....
pfft, just forget it,
coz i already forgot it!!
lol

omg,
i just watched the trailer for the Twilight movie..
& GUESS WHAT??!!!!

IT'S GONNA SUCK ARSE!!!!!

yes, that's a very nice description!
i don't feel like writing much today..
i'm sooo over it,
lol
there's like, heaps of things i could, and want to write about,
but...MEH!!!!
i feel so...DEPRESSED!!!!!
"the past is the past for a reason"
and i believe in that,
coz if you wallow in the past..
well, what point is that???
you might as well be...
i dunno, DEAD?!

ttyl

Don't ask me why that's the title,
but it was just in my head,
so i put it as the title! :D

So, today good/bad news just reached me!
i know it's good, but it's also bad!
but i don't wanna tell,
coz i've made a promise 2 Azlin,
and i know there's gonna be heaps of peeps dat will be sad,
but, i guess now is as good as time as any,
coz, it'll best if people hear it through this,
than through me in person....

well, my dad is angry with his work colleague...
so he said that maybe i'm moving back to aussie..
and i'm really happy about it,
but i'll miss all my new friends!!
-Azlin
-Melanie
-Ally
-Bebe
-Melody
-Smexxyyy-Pig Bro
etc.
:'(
i don't want to leave them,
but i want to be with my friends in aussie,
and if i had a choice,
i don't know which one i'd pick,
i love them from both sides..
i love them equally,
so now there's a down-side!!!

i just wish, that i could be with the people,
from both sides,
we should all live together,
i can't believe it's happening like this!!!
and, if i have to go back to aussie,
i have to see Courtney again!!
:S
:'( this is happy/depressing news.
if we leave here, i swear i'd wanna skin da man..
(yea..skin my dad, how err...nice?)
it's just that,
i thought he ruined my life when we moved here,
(but it turns out he didn't)
but now, i'll have to go through all the hassle of moving,
AGAIN!!!
and, i'll have to see a person that i DIS-like...
name: Rachel
reason why i hate her: hmm....we suddenly hated each other,
maybe coz she was in the "popular" group...

So i'm happy about leaving her! :D
i can't believe my life has turned out like this!!!
why??? WHY THE HELL IS IT LIKE THIS?!
tell me!!!!
please...I'M BEGGING YOU!!!
even if you say something like,
well you're just not meant to be happy,
i won't get offended!!!
JUST TELL ME!!!!!
seriously,
won't the man make up his mind???

geez...
lol
ok, some things about me.
I'm muslim (and proud)
i've thought about suicide (numerous times)
but never got anywhere near to commiting suicide ( i don't want to hurt myself)
another reason i don't die is coz i love my friends (they mean everything to me)
i'd risk so many things for my friends (i told you that they mean the world to me)
i could live without friends, but i won't really be happy (i'd be crying nearly everyday)
i regret loosing my best friends, (shashank & robbie)
coz i loved having them as my best friends,
and they were so nice,
and we've been through so many things together!
i can't eat fish (once, i accidently ate one of the fish in nasi lemak, almost threw up)
i look young...(lol)
i love family & south park (such funny, weird, stupid shows!)
i love to laugh (i love being happy)
when one of my friends is sad, i worry about them for a while (yeap, i'm very considerate)
i believe in ghosts (just coz)
i believe in lots of things actually..
i'm scared of growing up..
coz i'm scared that i won't like my job,
that i'll end up living on the streets,
that i'll end up marrying a man i don't even like,
that, that..
ok, i'll talk abut something else now...

*screams, and runs around in circles*
the PROM is on soon!!!
actually, it's in November, but meh..
i'm so happy!! :D
i was actually screaming in my mind when i found out,
coz i was so happy..
i've been waiting for this day ever since i came to this school!
(ok, maybe not)
but still, it's very exciting!!!
but i haven't asked if i can go yet..
lol
OMG
today at school was so fun!!!
(read alena's blog for other detail)
note that my new name is Rara Smoothie!!
And i call Alena, Ally Seph,
and beckah Bebe hurah..
etc.
we're in the same class..

~ FIRST ~
first we had english, for 2 periods!
In the first we had Ms Ong,
and i guess part of it was fun,
and second we had Ms Kerry,
that was when we had to do some test.
YES a test, in the first week of school,
but that is to place you in group 1 or group 2
I SOOOOO WANNA BE IN GROUP ONE!!!
not that i'd hate being in roup 2 or anything...
*shifty eyes*
then we had mandarin!
And me & alena weren't really paying attention,
and goofing around,
and being crazy..
well i was mostly crazy,
but i carried Ally's bag!
it wasn't that heavy,
and mine was so light!
so we "swapped bags"
After mandarin we had break,
which was just how it usually is,
and then we had fashion/art
we have to do freaking report on material!!
and then we had geography,
and Michael asked our teacher,
(i think her name is Mrs Hema)
if she had a baby,
and she did,
and he was like
OMG!!
it was so funny!
you really should've been there!!
When we were writing notes,
and she was in the way,
so i couldn't read anything
Me & Ally were "decorating" my geo text book.
i mean "decorating" as in,
we were graffiti-fied it!
it was very...err...beautiful??
here's the pic of it


beautiful isn't it??
Then, we went to lunch,
but we didn't really eat anything,
so we just hung out at the library!
It was alright-ish?
Then, Azlin came, so we walked around the school,
coz we were bored.
and computer was boring,
nothing exciting really happened,
but today, apparently i was really hyper!
(i don't remember if i told you that yet)
and i tripped over Azlin's feet,
AGAIN!!!
*stupid big feet*
JK!!
don't get your nickers in a twist!!
me & azlin made up another nickname!!
her name is penelope
and mine is lucy..
yea,
we wanted some new names,
so we picked them!
i better go now,
coz it's getting long,
and i'm running out of things to write about,
well, not really..
but anyways

ttyl

lol
i'm kinda FORCED to write about them,
and i guess it's about time i should....
i actually should've done it earlier on..
but meh!

Ok.
I MISS THEM SOOOOO MUCH!!!!
they're my best friends!!!!
we've been through everything together!!!!
i've been friends with Lucinda & Katie since i was in kindy!!!

I used to cry heaps of times,
coz i miss them,
i miss everyone being themselves!!
I miss KATIE!!!
I miss LUCINDA!!!
I miss STEVIE!!!
I miss MIRANDA!!!

I can't believe life has torn us apart....
who do they think they are??
separating best friends??
I can't believe it's ended up like this!!
I can't believe i have to live without them!!
My life would be different, if i didn't move,
i wouldn't have my friends here in Malaysia...
but i would still be with the "GANG"?
or group, or whatever you wanna call it!!
I miss my fav teachers!!!
I miss how english used to be!!!

If i didn't move, the whole ordeal with Courtney probably wouldn't have happened!!
here's the story...
There's this girl, called Courtney,
and she used (keyword, USED) to be one of my friends.
That was in term 1.
But then she left, and we we're without her!
I was actually SAD!!
But when she came back,
she was a total beetch,
and she sat with me for a few times,
but, i never really liked her anymore!
So, every since she left, i hated her!
Then, when i go,
she starts sitting with my friends,
or something like that,
and now they're pissed at her!!
But she deserves it!!
Her boyfriend broke up with her a few days ago!
And me & stevie want katie to go out with him,
to make her even more jealous!!

Courtney is a ex-friend,
that i'm happy to forget!
OMG
i need to talk to you!!!!
We should go to the same uni!!!!
So tell me where you wanna go,
and then we can go together!!!
We can live together,
and be with each other...
and we won't miss each other like MAD!!!!

Where are you?
I NEED you!!
The good thing is,
JESSICA IS COMING!!!!!
But not this year,
but next year,
JESS is coming!!!
WOOOOOT!!!!!!
I finally get to see her again!!!
And we can go shopping!!
And do all those things girls do!!!!
YAY!!!!!!!
I love all my friends in aussie!!!
I'll name them ALL

Kaitlin (Katie)
Lucinda
Stevie
Miranda
Eloise
Kirstie
Sophie
Emma
Robbie
Shashank
Declan
Ryan
Jade
Rachael R
Shazza
Kelsi
Sarah
err...
everyone that i like..
even if we're not exactly friends...

ttyl

OMG
today was the second day of school!!!!
And it was alright...
i almost fell asleep in business studies! XD
And i'm in the higher half of the class for science...
BTW, the only girl in that group!!!!
our maths teacher is gonna be here next week,
so i don't think we're gonna have any maths lessons til then,
we haven't been split up for english yet, but we will be soon!
geography is....alright-ish?
And history today was friggin AWSUM!!!
like, we kinda had to state what happened,
and the answers were in the text book,
and me & tarang were the ones that gave most of the info,
and rebekah gave some,
AND somehow,
it turned into a competition,
to see who could give the most info,
and apparently tarang won,
but who cares?
if i knew it was a competition,
then i probably would've won!
coz at the start, i answered nearly all of then!
So meh, i don't really care....

Anyways, i'm gonna do like,
about me thingo's in my blog,
but i think i told u dat earlier on,
so here's one.

About Me:
Girl
5'1" almost 5'2" (i think)
retarded
weird
crazy

Not only was it the first day of school,
but it's the first day of year 9!!!
ARGH!!!!!
So, this morning,
i was like so friggin nervous,
i was shaking all the way 2 school,
and a little bit while at school!!

Like, wtf?
in australia i wasn't like this,
so why am i like this here?
what difference does it make?
Anyways, so now, i'm in 9 aqua!!

like i said, but earlier on, i was having my doubts.
Like, OMFG!!!
I have a new name!!!
It's Rara Smoothie!!
how cool?
These are all my nicknames;
Daravana Smithyvellu
Cheese Head
Pee Face
Mushu
Freak
Rara Smoothie

and i think that's pretty much it...
the rest i don't really remember!

ttyl

Ok, so this is some random thing, that i just randomly thought about.
Well, i hate it when i'm trying to explain something,
and, coz it's funny,
or i think it's funny,
i start laughing, and i can't say it!!
So, here i am, LMAO,
and everyone stares at me, thinking,
what the hell is she taking?
Retarded huh?
And i used to do it so much,
actually,
sometimes i even started laughing,
for nothing.
Like, i was laughing for no reason.

Ok, so,
one day, alena like "strangled" me or something,
anyways, so after she done what she did,
i started laughing, i was LMAO!!!
And she said like, wat-da-shizz is ur problem?
or something like that.
But it was so, friggin funny!!

Anyways, so Sean-Li...
well, he asked if i wrote about him in this,
and i said yes, coz i did say some things,
and then he said, aww, i can't find it.
So i've decided to write about him,
so he feels even more loved by me!
haha
Soo....
he's nice?
yea, nice...
i wonder what he's gonna say about me saying that..

OK! So, today, i think i'm meeting clarence at midvalley,
to get my school books,
and school starts on monday,
kinda late right?
Well, i blame him for it all!
Like, we could've met up this week, but NOO
he says sunday.
So i'll kill him, with word abuse, or whatever you call it!
And i'm going to the bookshop, and somewhere else,
i forgot where!

ABOUT ME:
Name : Dara Smith
D.O.B : 9th of May, 1995
Star Sign : Taurus
Year : Year of the Pig

err, what else do you wanna know about me?
tell me, and i'll tell you....
(that doesn't really make sense)
Anyway, point being,
if you wanna know more about me, just ask me,
and i'll answer most of your questions.

ttyl

Today, i am reminded of my sad, cruel fate.
I HAVE TO GO TO BOARDING SCHOOL!!
Ok, so those of you may not know this,
but cempaka has this boarding school part,
and i'm gonna be staying there!
It'll probably start next year.
BUT, at least i have some freedom?
Lights out is at 11 (i think)
and curfew is like at 10 (i think)
but i don't really remember.
It'll be alright, i guess..
but i'm scared!
I told mum that i'm worried about how i'm gonna meet my friends!
And she said that the house mistress or whatever,
would organize some transport for me,
so i have FREEDOM!!

My lovely father, just had to mention boarding school today.
It turned my smile, upside down!
I almost cried for god's sake!
But now, i guess i'm alright with it.

In australia,
i was so sad, finding out that i had to move,
but i never cried infront of anyone,
not that i was stopping myself,
but i just couldn't,
but i cried at night,
when everyone was asleep.
Sometimes, when i was feeling sad,
i thought to myself, i don't care if i go,
it's not like anyone will miss me,
it's not like my life will get any worse.
But that goes away after a day or so
and i'm back to not wanting to go
back to wishing that it was canceled,
and i don't have to move!

But now, i'm happy with moving.
Dad said to me, if i'm not going to boarding school,
i might as well go back to australia.
It kinda made me sad,
coz i've made new friends and everything,
and i don't want to go back,
coz i'll miss them,
but then i think,
yay!
i'll see my friends in australia again!

It's so hard!
One half of me wants to stay here,
but the other half wants to go back to australia!
I want to be with my friends in both places!!
I don't want to leave anyone behind..
Actually, today, i think i almost cried,
like, the tears were pooling in my eyes,
when mum was talking to me,
and i couldn't tell if i started crying,
or not,
coz there was so much water in my eyes!

Ok, now it's time to tell you a funny story!
So, in yr 5 we were practicing this song,
and i was sitting next to my friend, Monica.
Halfway through the song, she told me to sing louder,
so i did,
and then she said
shh, not that loud,
and then we started laughing,
i laughed so hard, that i started crying!
After we finished the song,
Ms Walsh (my teacher at the time)
Said that was good,
and something about the two girls in the middle laughing half way through it!
She told me to go out, and wash my face,
coz i laughed so hard, that i was crying.
It was so friggin funny!

And this time, i think it was in kindergarten, or yr 1
but me and my friend (amy)
were sitting together at break.
And i was being retarded,
and making her laugh,
laugh so much, that she started crying!
And then the teacher walked pass,
and saw her crying.
And asked if she was alright.
I don't really remember, but i think she may have glared at me,
thinking that i made amy cry!
Anyways, so when she left,
me & amy started laughing,
coz she thought amy was crying coz she was bullied, or hurt!

haha, memories.
Please, if you sense that i'm not in a good mood,
try and make me happy,
and make me be my retarded self again,
if not,
you'll be dealing with a very emo,
girl.
And i won't be any fun.

ttyl
lurvs yahh
xoxo
muah

And those are MY feet in those point shoes..
not someone else's!!
Anyways...
So, my mum's phone, got stolen..
yea, so sad
but it was kinda her own fault
coz she put her phone in her pocket instead of her bag..
so she brought it on herself..
AND WE DIDN'T BUY ANYTHING FOR ME!!
:'( i know, so sad!!

Anyway, so the thing i wanted to write about today is..
Well, Sean wants me to join his school...
but i'm not allowed..
and he goes to this german school!!
And, i only know a little bit of german..
"Ich hasse deutchland"
"ich bin hungrig"
"ich liebe Dich"
"du hast eine vogel?"
"halt die klappe"
etc..
not much!!
and to think, that i HATED my german teacher in aussie!!
But i was always good at german..
i'll tell you this funny thing i wrote in our test..
it was probably our finals..
and my phone alarm went off
during the test
haha
everyone was looking at me!!
AND
we had to write this report thingo..
in german
so i wrote it
and i gave my parents guy names
and then i wrote something like..BTW, my parents are not gay, they just have guy names..
and she kinda got pissed..
and said..
"your in yr 7, so u can get away with it, but next yr, you won't"
oo
SCARY!!
haha

like, WTH was her problem??
she was always threatening us to bring Mr Sim into the class
haha
and she gave me detention..
just coz i didn't do my work..
WTF rite??

anyways,
that's all for now
ttyl
luv yahh!!
muah
xoxo

is the name of the song i just downloaded.
Yesterday i finished reading Twilight!!
And it is awesome!!
Now, i have to get the other books in the series, and read them!

I'm fudging starving...
I think it sounds awesome when you say..
WAT-DA-FUDGE?!

Anyways, i'm hungry coz i woke up at 1..pm
and i haven't had my breakfast yet..
but i'll probably end up eating noodles...
I'm currently watching courage the cowardly dog.
Coz i'm bored, not for the fun...
coz i wanna watch the grim adventures of billy and mandy..
and it's on after courage the cowardly dog..
and there's nothing good on..
how sad!

I think, no wait..
i NEED something to happen..
something amazing..
for me..
but i can't write what i need to happen
(that didn't really make sense, did it?)
anyways...
so a certain something doesn't happen..
i need that something i was talking about earlier to happen..
but..
i'm afraid!

Now, i can't write much more about that,
because you don't understand it..
and i might accidentally write something..
that gives a clue..

ttyl
lurvs yahh!!
muah
xoxo

So, how do you like my mags???
I made them today, coz i found the site...
and i was kind of bored...
But they're cool...rite???

My friggin friends in Aussie, are like..
never online when i'm on!!
It's so sad...
It's been so long since i last seen them...
Today, when i went out..
i FINALLY bought twilight..

I've started reading it now..
and i'm suddenly in Chapter 4..
and i don't even remember seeing the thing that says Chapter 3!!
lol
i'm so gay...
I think it's a easy book to read...
coz the font is big..
unlike the book that i just read..
which was memoirs of a geisha...
i like it..
but the writing was so small!!!
So, to read a book, with big writing..
is a relief!!
lol

And sean, i'm sorry, again..
for putting you in the nerd & moron mag...
i didn't want to put me..
and i didn't really have anyone else....
PLEASE FORGIVE ME!!

But i don't even know if your angry or anything...
hahaha
Anyway, i'm really happy that i bought a book..
because now i won't die of boredom!!!
hallelujah!
(i can't believe i spelt it right, in one try!)

Don't you just love my new layout??
IT'S FRIGGIN STEWIE FOR GODS SAKE!!!
who wouldn't like it???
But don't copy me!!
Coz if i see one my friend's blogskin's exactly the same as this one..
i will kill them...

That's the thing about me..
I don't really like people to copy me...
I'd give you an example..
but it's so gay..
point being..
i feel so....
i dunno..
i can't explain it!!

Oooohh!!!
I was retarded again today!!
YAY!!
But for some reason..
when it's getting late..
i get all emo...
sooooo sad!!!

hahaha
Lately, i've been talking to brodie more than i've been talking to my bffs...(in aussie)
not that i don't like talking to him...
he can actually keep up with my random-ness...
but suprisingly, most people do..
it's just that you'd think that you talk to your bffs more than a guy you haven't really met.

Like, we've kind-of met..
but anyways...
there's not point in explaining..
coz i don't really understand it!!
Why do i have to be so.....
whats the word...
RETARDED????

I HATE it when i forget words..
it can end up really embarassing...
like the time, i was trying to say my dad doesn't really get tempted by sweets...
last year...
and i forgot that the word was tempted...
so i said..
err...whats the word?? you know the word with the letters in it??
and i ended up saying
my dad doesn't really get seduced by sweets...
lol
everyone in my group started laughing!!!
EVEN me..
it was so funny..
but i seriously forgot the word!!
Shows how well my memory is!!
hahaha

ttyl
lurvs yahh!!
xoxo

So, like, days ago....sometime in one of my previous blog posts, i wrote about a dream.
In that dream, there was a guy, that i disliked.
Well, last night, i had a dream.
About his friend.
The tall shizz.
Well, he had to drive me home from school for some weird reason...
And it was really weird.
But someone just happened to mention the dream about fish lips.
So like, wtf? Why the hell are they in my dreams???
Like, in my dream, when i saw him,
i was like, oh shizz!
lol

So that was really weird...
and last night...
i suddenly went all emo!!
And it's really hard for me to get out of emo mode!!
So i couldn't be my retarded self! :'(
soooo sad!!

Today, i was told that i have a sexy body..
i was like, OMFG!!
like, it's a compliment and everything but..
i dunno..
i can't explain how i feel...
wen people say i'm hot, or sexy..

well...i'm not exactly retarded this morning.
But, if i talk to the right people...
i'll be back to my old self in no time!

ttyl
xoxo
lyrvs yahh
muah!

OMG!!!
I lurvs yahh brodie!!
the word, that i've been trying to remember since last year..
it's inbred!
And brodie was the one that reminded me of the word!!!
inbred, inbred, inbred..
but he's trying to win miranda's love..
But, she loves me..
so i'm rubbing it in his face!!
lol
anyways..
cya l8er..
ttyl
xoxo
muah!

I've got nothing to do today!
Someone entertain me!
I'm starving!
I just got back from Azlin's house, it was funny, coz last night, we sent requests to guys that we hate, to do some girl quizzes!
I soooo wanna see if they actually do them!
lol

I'm friggin hungry!
I only had breakfast at like, i dunno, 11?
And now it's 3.
:'(
I NEED TO DO SOMETHING!!!!

Someone call me, so that we can plan to do something in the last week of the hols!
Coz, i don't wanna be stuck at home, doing nothing!
Maybe, i'll invite someone to sleepover at my place!
That will be FUN!!!
lol

Anyways, yesterday, me & azlin, found the place where we're gonna buy our prom dresses! And it's our secret, so we're not telling ANYONE!
lol We saw some really kewl dresses yesterday.
It was so fun!!!!

Anyways
ttyl
lurvs yah!
muah!!!
xoxo

Actually, it didn't change my life, but it could've, i guess. lol
I'm sleeping over at Azlin's place tonight, and we went to mid valley with Sean-li. We ate at chilli's and then we had to go around looking for T-shirts for Sean-li's cuz. We didn't really find any!
I found out Azlin's deepest, darkest, secret.
So i had fun today!
And, Azlin & Sean-li made me make up with my mum. Which, i didn't really do.
shh, don't tell them! What happened was, this morning, i told my mum that i was sleeping over at Azlin's, and i asked if she could pick me up tomorrow. And, at first she said no, well, she just shaked her head, and said that she was doing something, but now, she's gonna pick me up sometime in the morning.
And then gradually, we started talking again!
So, i guess thats a good thing....
My phone sucks! It seems like a good phone, but it goes off my itself!!
:'( It makes me feel so sad!!
Anyways, ttyl
xoxo
lurvs ya!

OMG! I still lurvs ya miranda! (btw, her nickname is now my-random, and i'm the only one thats allowed to call her that)
She has no idea how she made me happier yesterday!!!!!!
You know how i was like, so sad and everything. Well, i know that i can trust my best friends, and my dad is good to me. I want to make things up with my so-called-"mother" but i don't know how. pfft she sucks. lol.
Anyways. This is dedicated to MY-RANDOM. Coz she made me happy yesterday, when no one else could! Well, i guess i just needed to talk to someone. I was just soooooo darn happy to chat with someone. I guess, if MY-RANDOM went online later, or if sean-li went on sooner, or at least started talking to me sooner, then it would've been different! And this would be dedicated to sean. But anyways. Ok. Now this is half dedicated to sean-li. Coz chatting with him kinda made me happier.
FUDGE-U-AZLIN! You weren't online, so you weren't the one that made me happy!
Anyways.
I LURVS YA ALL
xoxo
mwah

Ok. I'd like to thank MIRANDA for making me happier today! For making me feel like i do have a place in this world. THANKS MIRANDA! I LURV YA!
ttyl
xoxo

Today i had a BIG fight with my mum. Well, she's not my mum anymore. She is just an ordinary person in my life. And what was i thinking? Thinking about giving khal a chance. Well, those to people now have nothing to do with me. i HATE them. And i have no idea how i'm EVER gonna forgive my mum. No one gives a shizz about me. No one understands me. Maybe, maybe i was a mistake. I want to die. No one knows the pain i feel inside, what i feel everyday. The pain that made me almost give up on life today. All because of one person, that i thought i knew. That i thought cared about me. But now i know, that there's nothing in this world for me. Sometimes, i think that everyone in my life, that i care about is just pretending. Like it's a trick on me, their trick to ruin my life. I can't even trust my best friends right now. I just don't know who to trust. Why do i have to be so trusting?!
Why do i have to be me?
Why does there have to be a future?
I'm scared of the future. Scared of what i might be.
I HATE my life. But, I have to trust at least my best friends.
well, ttyl
xoxo